Dee Dub
Active Member
When: Sat 24 April '21, 10:30 for coffee, leaving at 11:00.
[EDIT] Where: Baffle Haus, just north of Penperlleni/Goytre, NP4 0AD. Revised meeting point! [/EDIT]
Description
2020 AD, and the citizens of Planet Earth were struck down by The Scourge. As the world's nations fell, each of us - in our own way - was broken. We few miserable souls survived by eating toilet paper and drinking our own urine (or bleach, depending on your political persuasion).
2021 AD, and we hairy bikers emerged into the sunlight to be greeted by scenes of devastation. Major roads have become the hunting ground of rival gangs of the undead, known as 'Cagers' and 'The Dementia'. To travel we must use those obscure, abandoned back lanes that are in such disrepair that no sane person would even consider, least of all when on two wheels. And we are definitely not sane.
Only the meanest and toughest will make it. Mad Max? What a pussy! We are... Big Trailie...
Oh, and there had been a bit of fly-tipping.
Route summary
The route goes over Pwlldu and along a high cliff edge. But don't worry: if a pothole sends your bike hurtling towards the precipice, there's a stretch of rusty wire to save you from certain doom. I'm sure the wooden posts aren't as rotten as they appear.
From Gilwern we zig zag over to Llangattock, then steeply up and over to scavenge a lunch break at Parc Bryn Bach. After riding along the loose-surfaced Manmoel Lane, there’s a steep slimy descent to a pretty village. We then traverse Markham moor. After a second stop at Parc Cwm Darran we cross over to the Bedlinog Common and jink down to the A470 near Nelson.
The whole route is on public roads, though expect mud, moss, and potholes. The Manmoel Road surface is a mixture of one part asphalt, two parts gravel, and three parts pothole. Add a little horse poo for seasoning. The views are nice, if you dare take your eyes off the road for a moment.
Actually, don’t take your eyes off the road, not even for a moment.
Important notes
[EDIT] The Baffle Haus is a biker café on the A4042 just north of Penperlleni/Goytre. The postcode alone will get you near but not exactly at the Haus. From the West Country, exit the M4 at junction 25A (just before the tunnels). From Cardiff/Bridgend, use junction 26. (Personally, I'd avoid the A465 Heads of Valley as the roadworks might be disruptive.) Follow the A4042 north past Pontypool (refuel?), and through Penperlleni/Goytre. The café is a few hundred metres on your right. [/EDIT]
Please ensure your bike has enough fuel for a few hours of low-gear riding. Turn up at the café with an empty tank and we will tease you mercilessly. You can scavenge fuel at [EDIT] the Shell Roundabout Services near Pontypool/New Inn, NP4 0XB. [/EDIT]
It may be a good idea to bring sandwiches and something to drink. The café at the lunch stop might be open for takeaway; the café at the afternoon stop was closed when there recently. Or you could scrape up some road kill for lunch. You know you want to. Lovely with a nice Chianti...
Usual rules on social distancing, face masks and hand hygiene apply. In particular, don’t allow the undead to get close enough to bite ya.
[EDIT] Where: Baffle Haus, just north of Penperlleni/Goytre, NP4 0AD. Revised meeting point! [/EDIT]
Description
2020 AD, and the citizens of Planet Earth were struck down by The Scourge. As the world's nations fell, each of us - in our own way - was broken. We few miserable souls survived by eating toilet paper and drinking our own urine (or bleach, depending on your political persuasion).
2021 AD, and we hairy bikers emerged into the sunlight to be greeted by scenes of devastation. Major roads have become the hunting ground of rival gangs of the undead, known as 'Cagers' and 'The Dementia'. To travel we must use those obscure, abandoned back lanes that are in such disrepair that no sane person would even consider, least of all when on two wheels. And we are definitely not sane.
Only the meanest and toughest will make it. Mad Max? What a pussy! We are... Big Trailie...
Oh, and there had been a bit of fly-tipping.
Route summary
The route goes over Pwlldu and along a high cliff edge. But don't worry: if a pothole sends your bike hurtling towards the precipice, there's a stretch of rusty wire to save you from certain doom. I'm sure the wooden posts aren't as rotten as they appear.
From Gilwern we zig zag over to Llangattock, then steeply up and over to scavenge a lunch break at Parc Bryn Bach. After riding along the loose-surfaced Manmoel Lane, there’s a steep slimy descent to a pretty village. We then traverse Markham moor. After a second stop at Parc Cwm Darran we cross over to the Bedlinog Common and jink down to the A470 near Nelson.
The whole route is on public roads, though expect mud, moss, and potholes. The Manmoel Road surface is a mixture of one part asphalt, two parts gravel, and three parts pothole. Add a little horse poo for seasoning. The views are nice, if you dare take your eyes off the road for a moment.
Actually, don’t take your eyes off the road, not even for a moment.
Important notes
[EDIT] The Baffle Haus is a biker café on the A4042 just north of Penperlleni/Goytre. The postcode alone will get you near but not exactly at the Haus. From the West Country, exit the M4 at junction 25A (just before the tunnels). From Cardiff/Bridgend, use junction 26. (Personally, I'd avoid the A465 Heads of Valley as the roadworks might be disruptive.) Follow the A4042 north past Pontypool (refuel?), and through Penperlleni/Goytre. The café is a few hundred metres on your right. [/EDIT]
Please ensure your bike has enough fuel for a few hours of low-gear riding. Turn up at the café with an empty tank and we will tease you mercilessly. You can scavenge fuel at [EDIT] the Shell Roundabout Services near Pontypool/New Inn, NP4 0XB. [/EDIT]
It may be a good idea to bring sandwiches and something to drink. The café at the lunch stop might be open for takeaway; the café at the afternoon stop was closed when there recently. Or you could scrape up some road kill for lunch. You know you want to. Lovely with a nice Chianti...
Usual rules on social distancing, face masks and hand hygiene apply. In particular, don’t allow the undead to get close enough to bite ya.
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